Tuesday, August 19, 2014

A Little Breakfast Boat

My plus-one is performing on a cruise boat for the rest of my life. Actual time, until December. This means I have a lot of time on my hands and at least one extra seat at my two-seat studio apartment table. While I'm jealous that he gets to eat french fries everyday, I'm not so jealous that he has to watch fat American tourists eat french fries everyday. Until his return we'll be skyping in our dinners and conjugal relations. We did do some crafting before he left but due to its graphic nature, I will not be featuring it on this particular website. You'll have to find that on our forthcoming love-Tumblr. 

Anchors Away Egg Boats! 

To be honest, I fucking hate brunch. Not the eggs, but what "brunch" represents. What a stupid thing it is to throw on your business casual after a night of rocking out to Dave Matthews at whatever tragic Wrigleyville watering hole you frequent, and spending fifty dollars drinking off your hangover. You end up annoying everyone in the city whose path you cross, and annoying everyone on your social media feed with stupid pictures of yourself drinking mimosas and "world's best bloody Mary's" which all end up looking pretty much the same. We get it, you work a boring 9-5 job and this is the one day a week you can just let your hair down. For those of us who think your douche-baggery is intolerable, this recipe is the best way to make breakfast impressive without being a turd about it. 

you will need the following: 

4 eggs
2 demi baguettes (I used pretzel)
salt & pepper
crushed red pepper (opt)

Step 1: Set your oven to 375. Hollow our your buns by cutting a deep V into the roll and pulling out the guts. Make sure not to rip a hole in the bottom or sides. 

Step 2: Make a kind of bruschetta with tomatoes, basil and onion. In a separate dish whip eggs with milk. Line the bottom of your boat with tomato mixture. 

Step 3: Follow with the egg mix. Then finish with the cheese. 

Step 4: Bake for 20-30 minutes or until eggs are solid. Check a few times to ensure the baguettes are not burning. 

Enjoy with toast, english muffins, bagel, cereal, oatmeal or any other grains you love. Carbs Carbs Carbs. 

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