With the holidays behind us, it seems we have fewer occasions to make festive confections. That's why when I had the opportunity to make a birthday cake this weekend, I jumped at the chance to try something new. No, that's not a guitar. It's a big black cake. A BBC, if you will. Turns out making a dick-shaped cake requires a little more planning than I had originally thought. After spending hours Pinteresting dick cakes, I decided just to wing it. Most of the instructions I saw required fondant, and I'd like to know who the hell has time for that?
Monday, January 19, 2015
Monday, January 5, 2015
No, you're not dreaming - this is the update you've been waiting with bated breath for. Looks like the last time I updated was right when my Fleetwood Mac obsession set in and now I'm practically over it.
Monday, November 17, 2014
In the days of the pilgrims, they must have had a lot more time on their hands to do shit like this. I'm guessing Indians didn't have to sublet their teepees. That's right. The Little Dinner Party is moving yet again, this time to a place with an actual kitchen and more than three chairs. Between showing my apartment to Loser A and Bad Credit B - I've barely had time to cook. You might say I'll be really thankful when this apartment is off my hands.
I like pumpkin stuff, sue me. Over the years I've gone back and forth between buying the cheap can of pumpkin versus taking the time and effort to make my own. Now that I'm a busy-bee, I've been buying it canned. Does it taste different? I have no idea. One just makes you feel a bit more smug when people ask for your pumpkin pie recipe.
Most people think the pumpkin in pie is from the goo inside. It's actually the shell, peeled and cooked. Not all pumpkins are good for this. Specifically a "pie" pumpkin is the one you should use. They are usually pretty cheap, but not as cheap as a can of pumpkin. One pie pumpkin makes about two and a half cups of puree, which can be used in any recipe.
Monday, October 27, 2014
This doesn't count as pumpkin because it's squash. Don't get me wrong, I love autumnal cuisine, but there are other ways to cook seasonally without allspice and nutmeg. If you're like me, you're probably really lazy. Lately I've been entirely too lazy to go on a full-scale grocery run but as a person of limited means, I don't do much take out. Occasionally this means scraping the bottoms of my cabinets and figuring out which one or two things I need in order to justify a stop at Jewel for Halloween candy. In this week's episode I remembered that I had a dusty box of spaghetti in the back of my pantry, and a week-old roasted butternut squash decomposing in my fridge. It's a good day when I have an egg. The result was very elegant. All I had to add was fresh sage, bacon and cheese. A trip to Jewel under $5, well $8 if you account for the well-deserved pint of Ben & Jerry's. It takes a lot of money to eat this cheap.
Butternut Squash Carbonara
Yes, I know it's not a true carbonara, but I don't really give a shit. Prosciutto tastes like human skin. Instead a used slightly crisped chopped bacon because this here is America damnit. I took a note from a Martha Stewart recipe I once screwed up and I started by frying the fresh sage in butter first. This resulted in more little crispy bits incorporated throughout. As you can tell I like any dish with crispy little pieces of fried things. Stay crispy this fall with butternut squash, arguably the tastiest squash. And cheap! I've got a family to feed.
you will need the following:
1 half roasted decomposing butternut squash
1 dusty half-box of spaghetti
1 where-did-this-come-from? egg
1 c when-did-I-buy parmesan cheese
3 tbsp chopped sage
2 strips crisped chopped bacon
1/2 chopped onion
2 cloves minced garlic
2-3 tbsp butter
salt & pepper
1.) Boil spaghetti. Reserve 1 cup of pasta water.
2.) Fry chopped sage in butter until crispy. Then add squash, onion, bacon and garlic and cook until warm.
3.) Slowly add in spaghetti and mix with squash and bacon. Add slashes of hot pasta water to keep the pasta moving.
4.) Shake in cheese while stirring in 1 egg. Keep stirring over heat until egg is mixed with cheese and pasta.