A Little Meatloaf Monday

No, you're not dreaming - this is the update you've been waiting with bated breath for. Looks like the last time I updated was right when my Fleetwood Mac obsession set in and now I'm practically over it.

A Little Pot (Pie) o' Gold

I give up on eating healthy. If it's never going to feel like beach season, I'm just gonna get as fat as I've always wanted. Hopefully it will lead to something great like an amazing career or diabetes. Since it's Pie Day, I figured it was an appropriate time to post this (even though I actually made these to eat while watching the Oscars stoned). This is not my first pot pie rodeo, I made pot pie once before, but it got everyone sick to their butts. This time around, I'm a little bit wiser.  This will also serve as my St. Patrick's Day recipe, since it contains potatoes and it's a pot of gold etc. That being said, I fucking hate St. Patrick's Day. It should just be renamed St. Fratboy's Day. The mere sight of Bros and Trixies wearing stupid green sport team shirts and ridiculous accessories boils my blood. Each seventeenth of March I go into a state of semi-hibernation, only leaving the house for Thin Mints and cat food. This year I've got a few pies to bake for a party, so fuck off everybody. 

Roasted Root Veggie Pot Pies

There's nothing sadder than a $.35 pot pie that sits freezer burning over the years, waiting for you to get just hungry enough to eat it. I made my own! As stated above, I made a pot pie once that caused everyone some digestive mayhem. This time around I opted not to use meat as I think the meat grease is what did people in. This was entirely off the cuff, and the fact that it materialized into anything is impressive. Since sweet potatoes were used in these, they were much sweeter than I expected - in the most delicious way. Some people make pot pies with a full double crust, but I like the look of just a pastry topper, plus it's easier. 

you will need the following: 

for pastry

3/4 c flour

1/2 stick butter

1/2 tsp salt 

garlic salt

herbs

1 tbsp shredded cheddar (opt.)

splash of cold water

for filling

1 small sweet potato (peeled and cubed)

3 carrots 

2 celery stalks

1/2 yellow onion

1/2 c flour

1/2 stick butter

3/4 c whole milk

3/4 c vegetable stock

fresh or dry thyme

salt & pepper

Step 1: Set oven to 375. Line a baking sheet with foil and dowse cubed sweet potatoes and carrots in olive oil, thyme, salt and pepper. Roast for about thirty minutes. 

Step 2: In the meantime, mix dry ingredients and cut in the butter. Using a pastry cutter or a large spoon work butter into flour mixture until crumbly. Add cold water one tablespoon at a time until desired consistency. Roll into a ball and chill for a few minutes. Roll out pastry and return to fridge until ready to use. 

Step 3: Melt half a stick of butter in a heavy-bottomed pot. Cook onion and celery in butter with lots of thyme until translucent. 

Step 4: Add half cup flour and heat for only a minute on very low heat. Slowly start adding the stock. Then add milk and begin whisking the mixture together. Add in roasted veggies. Use lots of salt and pepper, otherwise it's gonna taste very bland. 

Step 5: Pour mixture into pot pie dishes. Top with pastry. Brush with milk. Cut vent holes. Bake pies on a baking sheet for about 45 minutes. Allow to cool before serving. 

Thanksgiving Side By Sides - Part 1

Nothing kills your Thanksgiving buzz quite like a vegetarian at the table. Not to worry, as long as the side dishes hold out, everyone can be happy, sort of. I'm not crazy about sweet potatoes, but I discovered this interesting method in a Southern cookbook a few years ago. I've even converted some sweet potato haters with this savory little gem. I make these all the time because they're cheap and easy. Sweet potatoes, unlike baking potatoes, are actually pretty good for you too. If you're fortunate enough to have two racks in your oven, pop these babies in about an hour and a half before you take the turkey out. 

Sweet Potato Halves with Crispy Fried Rosemary

The best part about this method is that the rosemary will get crispy beneath the potato while the potato blackens. You can't really fuck this up, so don't worry. Also, if you're short on rosemary you can use thyme too, it won't get crispy but it does the trick. 

Step 1: Set oven to 400ish. Line a baking sheet with foil, a little olive oil and course sea salt. Set down rosemary sprigs where you intend to place potatoes. 

Step 2: Stab potato all over with a fork. Cut (or widdle if your knives suck as bad as mine do) sweet potatoes lengthwise. 

Step 3: Score the exposed tops and then slather with butter. You can't put too much butter on there. In fact, put a few little flecks right down on the baking sheet. Sprinkle whatever other seasons you like on the potato tops too, they'll need it. Place halves orange-side down onto rosemary and roast for an indefinite amount of time. Once they start oozing, you're good.